Monday, February 23, 2009

Pop Test Today!

Don't act like you didn't know!
You were warned!
You had all day to study!
It's Pop Test Time!
(Stop NOW if you are easily offended!)

Directions: Multiple choice answers...
you are responsible for answer D.
A. Do you want ANOTHER little wiener, Harold?

B. I don't care if you have a headache, Harold. Eat my wienee!

C. Harold, I was just thinking of you as I stabbed this sharpened stick into this tiny piece of meat!



Whispering Pine Cottage said...

Harold replied, Honey I have never been so turn on in my life, and with that he set the bucket of ice down and preceded to...

Cher said...

Yah, that's a nice weiner but I think you've got your dress on backwards. The plunging-to-the-waist neckline goes in back!

trash talk said...

Lilith, this isn't exactly what I meant when I said "How about a little hangdown later".

Moonlight Hollow Musings said...

Okay,kids...I'm going to call you to my desk one at a time so we can go over your comments in private! We don't want the rest of the class to hear this, do we? Angie, you come up here first, honey!

Angie,child, you are definitely an overachiever! I know you don't need this pop test...I know that you are well-prepared. I swear you are always three steps ahead of the rest of the yahoos in this class. But...and this is a big but,, not MY big butt, Angie, but thanks for asking...but I asked you to do this little pop test just like everyone else in the class. But no, you have to jump ahead and start on Wednesday's assignment, The Never-Ending Story! Now sit your little butt down and complete this pop test! Yes, Angie, I will move you to the Bluebird group. Yes, Angie, the Bluebirds are the smart group...aren't you clever to figure that out...always three steps ahead of the others!

Cher,you are next! Cher move a little closer to me please. I want to make sure you hear what I have to say! I am worried about you, Cher. You spend all your time thinking about how you can attract the boys in this class...especially the boys in tight jeans! But I am a little disappointed that you are resorting to wearing your clothes backwards so that you can have that plunging neckline! I know you like to show them off, honey, but that just isn't appropriate for school! Think about it...what does that say about you? No, it does not say that you have big boobs!Anyway, my job is to make sure that you are prepared for the real world...and in the real world you are not going to be able to dress like that in the work place! No, Cher, you are not going to be able to find a job where you can wear a swim suit! I worry about you, girl! Did your Mama ever drop you on your head? Now go sit down and leave your hands off the boys on your way to your seat!

Debbie, sweetie, could you come up to my desk? Now, Debbie, you are doing very well in my class, but I need to know who in the world is teaching you science? Whoever heard of calling the male privates a hangdown? Oh, Mr. Thibodaux is your science teacher...that explains it! What, Debbie? A hangdown is not an anatomical part? It is a sausage?!!! Well, no, mind was not in the gutter! I just assumed...what, Debbie? Yes, I know what assuming makes me! Where are you picking up all this smart ass language, Debbie? What? No! Tell me you are pulling my leg! You are NOT dating that Cat Daddy boy, are you? He is nothing but trouble, Debbie! You stay with him and you will find yourself living in a tiny little trailer is some remote part of Texas! You better listen to me, Debbie. Okay, then, do what you want...but you are out of the Bluebird group! Move on over to the DoDo Bird group!

Now...let's sit down and take our time and take this test again!

Sue Jackson said...

D."Harold, this little wienie reminds me of our first date, and well actually, our last date as well"!

Cher said...

Yes, teacher. I'm sorry teacher. I'll retake your stupid test, teacher.

D. During a clinical trials party, Harold takes his first dose of a new long brown pill called Viagra.

trash talk said...

Dear teechur,
As Lilith said to Harold, "Bite Me!".
ur frend,

Cher said...

Hey, Teach. Can I do another one for extra credit? No? I'm doing it anyway!

D. Lilith, if you don't quite jabbin' me with that wienie sticker, I'm gonna dump this ice bucket full of Dr. Pepper over your pretty little head!

Linda said...

Look familiar?

Woman in a Window said...

Lilith, I just don't understand your slight of hand tricks. You're so darned fast I didn't even feel you in my pants and yet the proof is right there!