Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Sentence Prey

"Three of them, hard men carrying nylon bags, wearing work jackets, Carhartts and Levi's, all of them with facial hair."

That is the first sentence of this book,
John Sanford's Storm Prey.

So why am I sharing this with you?

Because this opening "sentence"
drives me crazy!

I can't leave it alone!

Why would John Sanford begin his new
novel with this jumble of a sentence?

No, I am not the grammar police.
No, I do not always follow grammar rules
when I am writing.
In fact, I am not a rule follower in general.
I don't like rules.

Maybe it is just me.
Perhaps this opening sentence did not
capture the attention of other readers.

I just think Sanford should have paid
more attention to his first sentence.
Just saying...

You know John Sanford, don't you?

Sanford also wrote:

Rules of Prey
Shadow Prey
Eyes of Prey
Silent Prey
Winter Prey
Night Prey
Mind Prey
Sudden Prey
Secret Prey
Certain Prey
Easy Prey
Chosen Prey
Mortal Prey
Naked Prey
Hidden Prey
Broken Prey
Invisible Prey
Phantom Prey
Wicked Prey

Sanford is a very religious man!
He writes a lot about praying!

His books aren't about that kind of praying?
Prey, as in an animal which is hunted,
or a person who is a victim of an enemy?
Well, whatever.
All I know is that after I read one of his novels,
I usually say a prayer.
I pray that I won't ever meet one of his twisted villains!

I also pray that Lucas Davenport
or Virgil Flowers
might just drop by my house for a few minutes...
or hours...
or days.
These two sexy cops can check out
my crime scene at any time...
if you know what I mean!

Lucas and Virgil aren't real?
Well, thanks, John Sanford for almost
messing up my happy home with Lurch!
Did you have to create your characters
to be so dang real?

Wow! How did we end up here?
Sanford, just check out your first sentence
in your next novel.

Virgil, me!


trash talk said...

I'm with you...jangles the nerves. No rhythm and I can't dance to it...I give it a 2.
I'm not familiar with his novels, but least he can spell prey correctly...lots of practice, right?
P.S. For a moment I thought he was describing Cat Daddy's work crew!

MikeWJ at Too Many Mornings said...

Not a complete sentence. No idea why he would do that. Seems wrong. Like the imagery--evocative and descriptive. Must read him sometime, when I'm in the mood for incomplete sentences. Rarely happens. Good post, funny and frustrated, though plaintive at the end.

red.neck chic said...

I'm laughing - I don't even know this guys books - and seriously - looks like one of MY opening sentences... but I'm laughing at YOU! And, for some reason, I find myself wanting to go to Barnes & Noble.... hmmmmmm....

I'm waiting for Antonio Bandares to come knockin'... every morning I stick my head out the door looking for him... HE WILL COME AND PREY ON ME!!! Oh wait...

;-D xoxo

lulu redstar said...

My sistah, the writer, says that the first sentence of a book should grab you by the a%&$ and haul you in...a good way to find a good read....feeling your....flame. I just finished GirlwiththeDragonTattoo and it's sequel....waiting to get the final installment...and for my doorbell to ring and have.....waiting to 'pat me down'...oh my

Sue said...

You had me at, "hard men carrying nylon bags"! I have this image in my head of, well, never mind, you know what I mean!

Take care, Sue

Whispering Pine Cottage said...

I just finished this book. Not one of his best, but Virgil could be voted this years sexiest man alive! I know he is fictional, but what a great guy! Angie